What a day! Have you ever have one of those? A day when you feel like it MUST be Friday the 13th? A day when the whole world is play a game of “Cream the CRV” and no one told you that you are “it”?

Last Wednesday was mine! I forced myself to get up at a semi rational hour – 8 AM – AND got dressed. Those of you who know me know what a feat that is in itself these days! I had such a plan! Doctor’s office, post office, lunch, pedicure, pet store … I was even going to brave WalMart! This would be the most ambitious day I have set for myself this year!

Out the door I went at 9 headed to the doctor’s office to pick up some of his great vitamins. The trip went without tribulation. In fact, all was fine until I came back out of his office. My car, not used to sitting in a driveway for days at a time, hasn’t given me much trouble since I bought her ten years ago (used, already seven years old).

The last few times I had started her, the battery made an odd cranking, clicking noise. A heart clenching, foreboding sound at best but she’d always started. Now, I don’t claim to know a lot about cars but, when I got divorced several decades ago, my father said if I was going to be one of those divorced women, I was going to know something about cars so I could be independent. He showed me how to change the oil, how to find and fill all the reservoirs (and what to fill them with) – water, oil, brake fluid, etc. (Remind me to tell you about the great spark plug debacle someday.)

Of course, everything under the hood has changed now but, all this to say, I should have recognized that clicking sound and replaced the battery immediately …. oooohhhh nooo … love to press my luck do I! Thanks to a very nice man who came out of the doctor’s office and didn’t ignore my raised car hood, I was on my way very soon. Not the 45 minute wait my road side assistance (which I promptly cancelled) plan told me  … more like 15 minutes. First, he told me to roll the car backwards (yes, I turned the wrong way) so I ended up in the middle of the parking lot. That way he could get his truck close enough to my car. He pulled his huge red truck around and came to the head of my car. This tall, obviously working (greasy coveralls and all) man reassured me that everything would be fine. Anyone who needed out could just wait patiently. Then he said, if they didn’t want to wait, he’d introduce him to his dog. As he said the dog’s name (Bubba – what else in the South), an enormous red pitbull jumped out of the truck. Bubba walked over to the other side of the car from where I was standing and looked at me. After a long moment, he gave a gentle snuffle, (I swear) winked at me and plopped down on the pavement.

My cables were trashed (having never been used) but, as soon as he hooked his cables up, the car turned right over without a problem. I went back to the front of the car and thanked them both before pulling away. Straight to the nearest automotive store I drove, praying all the way the car didn’t stall on Glenwood Avenue at the busiest intersection in town or in all that traffic! A nice young man sold me a battery, came outside and installed the new one. He did shake his head and say he had never seen a battery so old in his whole life (he was all of 20 years old!).

When he asked me to crank it up, I straightened up from watching him. I shifted the keys in my hand and the Panera tag on the ring broke. The tag stayed in my hand but the cussed keys slid right down the middle of the engine to the ground. To his credit and my happiness, the young man didn’t even flinch, just slid down under the car and fished them out for me. I’d never have been able to do that! Car started and I was off, only 30 minutes behind self-imposed schedule. That’s when the road side assistance guy called and asked where I was. Hmmmm!

As for the rest of the day … ooohh, my!

I could tell you about the lady who decided to come into my lane without checking to see if I was there, the two semi rigs that decided to change lanes without regard of me being there, the car I stopped behind in a parking lot who didn’t bother to look in her rear view mirror before backing out (fortunately I have great peripheral vision!), the six cops I saw (did I put on seat belt — of course not!)  the ambulance that decided to flip its lights on and leap into the intersection I was half way through, and the traffic jam I almost got caught in …. but suffice it to say, I went home.

Enough adulting for me in one day. All grist for the mill! On a happier note … Happy Easter … also April Fool’s day and the first day of Camp NaNoWriMo, a mini NaNo for those of us who cannot find enough ways to stress ourselves out! With any luck at all, I’ll have novel #4 ready to go on Amazon within a couple months!

Today, more than ever, I remind you … Nolite te bastardes carborundorum!! Catch ya next time!